Rae's Record - July 2023

Issue 2

1. Announcements

Welcome to Issue #2 of Rae’s Record.

2. Monthly Goal Summaries

Below is a brief update on my current goals list.

A) Arts & Crafts

A Strawberry

Progress was made. It’s at a point where I’m unsure of what is going on, but I’m following the tutorial as best as I can. It’s supposed to be on its side, which I didn’t realize until the shading portion of the project.

Fairy Cross-Stitch

This project was stuck for a little bit. I had miscounted and had to restart the adult fairy’s legs, but I’ve made a lot of progress on it this month. Ignoring the instructions and just choosing one colour to focus on has largely been a good thing for me. Have I mentioned how much I dislike working on navy blue Aida? It makes it more difficult to count for some reason.

B) Health & Fitness


I’m still struggling to get treatment despite being diagnosed. Without a family doctor it is hard to get medication for ADHD. Currently, I’m managing with about 100 mg of caffeine per day. It’s not ideal, but it is what I have access to.

The biggest thing I’ve done in July is accept my diagnosis. That has brought an inner peace. I’m still often frustrated by our health care system, but accepting myself has let me get back to creating. I’m feeling happy more often than I have in a long time.

One of the things I often struggle with because of ADHD is time blindness. Time blindness is a propensity to lose track of time while doing something I enjoy. For me, these are typically all creative activities like writing, sewing, drawing, music, and crafting. Occasionally, I will also lose track of time while I’m having fun with friends.

How I have learned to deal with my time blindess is a mixed bag.

  1. I tried to not allow myself do any of those fun things before an appointment. I know some other people who have ADHD will get stuck in this “waiting mode.” I can become so worried about missing an appointment that I can’t do anything else but think about it and constantly remind myself that I have the appointment. This resulted in me not doing anything fun in busy weeks and made me incredibly unhappy, so I recommend using this technique sparingly.

  2. I set alarms to snap me out of a hyperfocus if it happens. This isn’t perfect. I can ignore alarms sometimes or get distracted soon after and forget it even went off. It’s important to change the sound of my alarms regularly to help ensure I will hear them and react accordingly.

  3. I recently started allowing my self to be late to events that aren’t so critical. Like meetups at bars. I find this has brought a bit of balance to the chaos that comes with having ADHD. I’ve found that letting myself relax on the time I arrive at social events that aren’t big events makes it easier for me to make big events like weddings a priority because I don’t feel like I always have to be on and this reduces my stress levels overall.

  4. For important appointments, I tend to add extra time and end up there too early. I always bring whatever book I’m currently reading in case of this. Being too early can be a problem, but it’s more rare that it is. One tends to look over eager instead of irresponsible when they are a bit extra early.

  5. One thing I’ve never figured out? How much time it takes for me to do a task. Just give me a deadline and I’ll probably make it. I may even get it done before the time. But if I have to figure out how much time, I get stuck.

Sjögren’s Syndrome

I suspect that my Sjogren’s is the reason I’ve been needing extra puffs from my inhaler during softball, though I’m not 100 percent on that. If I had a doctor, I would get it checked out. It could also be just that the heat and humidity have been so high that it’s normal with exercise-induced asthma.


I didn’t enjoy free yoga. I’ve kept Chair Yoga for now, but the rest were not the peaceful, stress-relieving kind that I was hoping for. My plan is to switch to Tai Chi as I’m far more interested in it. I may or may not start it in the latter parts of August. I will definitely start it come September. It can be like my back to school thing.


One rainy Friday in July, I caught the ball and got someone out. I’m hoping I’ll do it again before the season is over. It felt so good!

On the vision front, I am seeing best just wearing my new glasses. I have some sport straps to try out in a couple of weeks when we are back at it. It’s a long weekend right now and this upcoming weekend is my team’s bye week. It’s also the team party, which I’m missing out on. Why hasn’t teleportation been perfected yet?!

C) Home & Lifestyle

I’ve made a small amount of progress on my decluttering project. It still feels neverending, but I know that’s not true. I just want to be on the other side of it. All of the clothing items I need to alter are hanging neatly next to my sewing desk, which is much better than them being strewn about. I’ve been gradually altering one at a time and adding it to my wardrobe. It’s slow-going, but any steps forward are better than standing still. Unless stepping forward would mean falling into a sarlacc pit or having one’s head chopped off by a booby trap.

Speaking of boobies, I got out to see some Burlesque this month. Koston Kreme was quite lovely to see perform. I also got out to see some roller derby and it felt like going home.

D) Music & Gaming

One of the things I have struggled with for a long time with music is choosing which songs to play. Back in January, I went to a queer jam night that friends hosted. There was a set list, though I didn’t know that before I got there. I brought my ukulele and a sheet of chords and tried my best. Really, I was needing to be around people as it was the day before the first anniversary of losing my mother. I think I did OK considering other people had been aware the music was shared in advance and I was not! I spent July practicing those songs on my keytar. This had me learn chords and several songs more than I knew before. It also got me to practice and play along with a chord chart instead of sheet music, which has been a barrier to progressing for me.

I don’t know why I struggled as hard as I did, but I suspect it was being consumed in getting it perfect or right more quickly than is realistic. It’s OK if I can only play the chord in a basic way at the start. Yes, it might sound better if it is a broken chord instead of a literal one, but I can learn that as I get better at the basics of playing in time with the music. I don’t know why I put so much pressure on myself regarding this, but I’ve decided to stop doing that. It doesn’t lead to success.

Anyway, I brought a melodica to the Pride edition this month and played the root notes of the chords, which went well until We Are The Champions, but that song is very complex. It’s always a good time, but a local queer musician, OK Naledi, was there and that made the event extra special.

On the gaming front, I gave up on Rise of the Tomb Raider. Why? Because I came to learn that I wasn’t going to beat the section I was stuck at because I didn’t get one specific skill. I hate when games do that on easy mode. Easy mode is to experience the story. I should be able to do that and not hit a wall where all I do is continually die. I don’t want that challenge in my gaming as my daily life is challenging enough.

E) The Writer's Desk

Outside of making some progress with editing, I spent a lot of the month dealing with work and chasing leads on getting medicated for my ADHD. Towards the end of the month, I started to feel better and inspired by the various experiences I enjoyed. So not much progress here, but soon there will be.

3. Monthly Blog Summary

I spent the month catching up, learning skills to help manage my ADHD better, playing softball, decluttering, gaming, and hanging with friends.

For a more in depth look at how July went, head over to my blog and read the posts.

4. Playlist of the Month

A new month means a new playlist.

5. Coming Up

August will have me spending time with family and working on a horror screenplay. I almost wrote a screamplay instead and I think it would have worked. I’m a writer, so I can invent new words, right? It’s actually the title of a horror screenplay. Apparently. My screenplay only has 8 pages to it currently and it needs to have between 90 and 120. I may get behind on my blog posts while I work on this.

6. Meet Ups

Please see my public calendar for events I’m hosting or attending.